As before

I wish sometimes that when I look at letter I know, to have the ability not to read it, or if I look at a picture not knowing  what it is and then get it, I wish I could go back to the state of not getting it but at the same be able to know it. 
I wonder if something like this could be possible except in cases of some loss or damage in the brain but then it does not make you able to know it at all.
I can never see myself without the changes that happened in my life. Was it good or bad! And I started to think that everything works this way. But it did not seem right... and a peaceful thought came to my mind that God does look at me, with my whole changes, as before, as His own image.